You go through your day to day life coping, accepting (or so you think), and moving forward… then you go to sleep and your mind spirals into representations of darkness, panic and fear. Some nights I go to bed and wake up calm, others I wake up with such a strong sense of doom and fear that it shakes me for days. And then that fear manifests itself in different ways; impatience, oversensitivity, irrational behaviour…

Hopefully tonights sleep is calming. I have to get up and run at 5:30am so I need my rest! I am back to work for a few more days until my surgery; keeping myself busy both with work and working out. Since the doctor was kind enough to let me know that I will likely gain weight, I am now a mission to be fitter than fit!

Wishing everyone calm and restful thoughts ❤️❤️❤️